In the first of our new series of blog posts, we give a voice to our male clients who want their stories to be heard.
Men come to us for a wide variety of reasons – as with anyone who comes to us for help. For men however, it is often the recognition that help is needed that is the biggest problem. Getting to that point, and then being willing to open up is a huge step for many. A barrier that needs breaking down.
We are telling these stories to encourage men, to show that help is not only readily at hand but that it is a part of a much-needed solution. One which will help them take back control, and their life. Mental health does not discriminate. It can and does happen to all kinds of people from every walk of life.
Black Thursday, the Wall Street crash of 1929, the start of The Great Depression – this is what one male client compared his realisation to, the day when it all became just too much.
“I had my Black Thursday, the day when it all became too much to cope with, the day I realised I couldn’t do it without some help. Work was impossible, and home life was no easier.
“Over the weeks and months which followed – and beyond – I’ve learned many things, about myself, and about how important good mental health is to us all. Looking back, certain things stand out. One is to understand that it is okay to feel like you do. It is that realisation that allows you to start to put it right.
“The next is that you cannot put it right alone, the power of being prepared to talk, openly and honestly, about how you’re feeling is so important. Only then can anyone help you to put things back together and start to recover.
“I had conversations I wouldn’t have previously dreamt of having. I bared my soul, shared my fears and anxieties, and felt so much better for doing so! There are days when it still feels very difficult to cope, but I now have ways to deal with that, and people I know I can trust and turn to. There is no need to suffer in silence and alone. The solution is to talk, to ‘let people in’, to feel no shame, and to allow yourself to embrace and rely on others.
Admitting to ourselves that we aren’t coping, that we need to ask for help can feel like an impossible task. Admitting to ourselves that we aren’t coping or don’t feel happy with how we feel about our life can be really hard to say out loud.
At Fortis we know that getting in touch can be literally the hardest step, so we make the process of asking for help and support to be as approachable and as easy as possible. We then make sure that we match you to the right therapist for you, so you are on the path for the most helpful and effective experience possible. Having protected, confidential time with someone you can trust, where you can speak about feelings and experiences you feel you can’t talk to anyone else about – verbalising what is going on in your head – really helps. Therapy works because of the trust and honesty you build in the relationship, feeling safe, not being judged and working together on your beliefs and thinking and feeling differently. It is a life changing and sometimes life-saving (both literally and metaphorically) process.
We’re Here To Help
If you need help please get in touch with us, or pass our details onto someone you know is struggling. You can email [email protected] or call 01472 241794. We have offices based in Grimsby, Scunthorpe, Hull and Louth. We can offer face to face 1-2-1, couple therapy and provide online sessions for everything we do.