Could family therapy help the Beckhams - and you?

The Beckhams have been in the headlines lately for something other than football and fashion. This time, the stories have centred around a suspected falling out between Victoria and David and their eldest son, Brooklyn. 

With Brooklyn and his wife, Nicola Peltz, noticeably absent from Dad David's 50th birthday celebrations and the press reading into every perceived or real slight on each family member's social media, it's a family fallout in the international spotlight.

The Beckhams may not be relatable to most of us in our day-to-day lives, but many will recognise the pain and difficulty that come with a family dispute. 

When do you need family therapy?

Our close family members see both the best and worst of us and know our personalities inside and out. Having people who understand how you work and share a lifetime of experiences and memories can create deep bonds. When an event or disagreement rives these bonds, the division can seem irreparable. 

A change in family dynamics can also create seismic ruptures in relationships. As we see in the case of the Beckhams, the press's supposition is that now that Brooklyn is married, his relationship with his wife has altered the one he has with the rest of the family. This can also happen when a new family member is born, as people go through different stages of their lives and when a family member dies. 

Each event marks a shift in bonds and a need to adjust. We all want the best for our family members, but it can be hard to recognise and let go of the difference between our version of 'the best' and their version. 

How can family therapy help?

Usually, time and space allow us to view things in a rational manner. Family dynamics often put forward a peacemaker who will mediate between family members to bring everyone back together. But what happens when that peacemaker can't heal the divide or gets fed up with having to?

This is where family therapy can step in. Your therapist is fully impartial to any disagreements or differences and is able to facilitate space for each family member to speak and listen. 

Family therapy is an opportunity to speak openly, without judgement. Your therapist will ask good questions, which allow each person to express how they are feeling and be heard. 

Can family therapy change how we communicate?

One of the biggest challenges in family relationships is good communication. Over the past 10 to 15 years, the way we communicate has undergone significant changes with the advent of smartphones and social media. The nuanced and sometimes pointed postings on Instagram in the Beckhams' conflict speak to a different way of getting a message across. People thousands of miles apart can express how they are feeling without the chance for an easy reply or open discussion. 

Your family therapist will provide you with the tools to communicate effectively and understand when and how to do so. They will teach you ways to see the perspective of other family members and unravel a tangle of past incidents. 

Could family therapy help the Beckhams?

The answer is yes, and they are welcome to get in touch. However, more importantly, it can also help you. 

Whether it's one family member going through a hard time and the others struggling to support them, or the whole family is grappling with change or upset, our trained therapists are here to guide you through.